Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Little Us

I can't ever get angry at the
grown-up George. I sit here looking
at this endearing little child all
day, because he sits next to my 
calendar.  I decided we should all
keep a photo of our beloved as a
child nearby, to remind us how much
we love them and how tender and
vulnerable they are.
- Judy Blume

Some of the greatest advice I received
while engaged to be married was from my
Aunt Susan, who told me,

There will be times when you'll be
more deeply in love than others
over the years, but as long as the
friendship remains strong, you'll
weather love's ebb and flow.

At the time, my own parents' marriage
was tenuous, and my aunt wanted to
reassure me that even the best
unions experience ups and downs.

I listened.  She was right.

I discovered this Judy Blume quote in
a recent magazine interview, and loved 
her idea so much that I searched our 
house until I found a little-boy
photo of my own husband to display
on my desk.

Although we are grown up on the outside,
we still carry the fragility of the once
little us on the inside.  Born innocent
and defenseless, our souls are like
smooth swathes of sandy beach, until
life's breezes, winds and storms
leave their marks.

No one's beach stays smooth forever.

It's good to remember those pure
sands when dealing with people who
we love, whether a spouse, parent, 
sibling, teen or adult child,
because that little one is still in
there, craving reassurance that 
they are safe and beloved, 
just as they are.

Perhaps the photo we especially
need to frame is one of ourself
as a small child.  After all, we are
often our harshest critic, forgetting
the past self who always travels
with us.  The wide-eyed one
who talked to the man in the moon,
dreamed big dreams, was sometimes
scared of the dark and who loved
to jump through sprinklers and make
wishes on birthday candles.

Do you remember your little you?

Wouldn't a photo of that tiny soul,
propped where you'd see it daily, make
you smile and perhaps, be kinder
to yourself?

I double-dog-dare-you to find out.

Sending summer hugs from the little
one in me to the little one in you.


PS:  Thank you, Aunt Susan,
and thank you, Judy Blume : )

all photos P&H