Friday, December 17, 2010

Finding It

Have you felt
this holiday season?

That burst of 
Christmas joy
dancing to get out
the quiet anticipation
you carry in your heart?
Or maybe
your it
isn't dancing
or quiet, but

I must admit
there were years 
I have felt it
and other years

Not sure why
in those years I
found it rather
but in others,
I had to search.

This year, I'm
still looking, seeking,
yearning for that
inner joy that says
YES, it's Christmas.
Despite the decorations,
the special lunches,
even the advent candles,
I'm still looking for
my own Christmas star.

I felt a wisp of it
this morning when
I took Gracie out to
get the paper.....
It was still dark and
snow was coming
down softly, like
a snow globe. 

 I've lived through 
countless snowy 
winters, but falling
snow still makes my
 soul sing.  And suddenly,
I found myself
floating back towards
the house, pj pants
sticking out from under
my coat, feet stuffed
into warm boots 
and a smile on my face.

For meit 
can't be found
in the big productions
 large gatherings,
shops or mailbox,
but in the small
things, if I 
remember to
see them with
my heart.

This little story
from Robert Fulghum's
Christmas Friarworks
sums it up for me.....

Uh-oh, here comes Christmas

When Sam was three years old he attended the Little School of Seattle.
Which met in the basement of a church.
And kept its general supplies in the foyer of the women's restroom.
Sam discovered this treasure trove one morning late in November.
Therein was a king-sized canister full of red glitter.
Upside down over his head.  All over the restroom.
And down the hall and around the corner and into the Director's office.
But before anyone could mutter Oh-my-God-what-a-mess,
Sam sang out ~ hands in the air, laughter on his face,
You know what?  YOU KNOW WHAT?!

There's Christmas in the bathroom.
And therein lies the message.
Beauty, so said the ancients, is in the eye of the beholder.
And Christmas is and ever will be found where it's looked for.
Most often close by, most always very underfoot.
Hidden away in the cupboards of our lives, waiting
to be rediscovered in a rebirth of wonder.
Waiting to be dumped over our hard heads like blessing oil.
Waiting to be scattered like red glitter
on the walls and hallways of dark December.

Christmas will be found ~
In closeted memories, vision, hopes, fears,
half-forgotten songs and muddled stories of a
child of long ago and in the story of a child named Sam.

Christmas will be found ~
Even in bathrooms ~ by those who know how to see.

Have you 
found it, yet?

Where do 

Here's to a 
weekend filled
with Christmas magic,
whether dancing or quiet.


PS:  Thanks for all
the wonderful comments
about the Christmas Rolls.
You can click here for
a condensed version of the
recipe.  Enjoy!

all images:  
Privet & Holly


Castles Crowns and Cottages said...

Good morning dearest friend,

I am here in my classroom, last day before my two weeks off. I think I will find my "it" during the vacation break because I am exhausted. Though joy fills me, I need quiet to find "it"....and thank you for this beautiful reminder to SEEK IT and do something about it. Here is wishing you success and most of all, that peace that comes with every glimmer of your own special star....


Anonymous said...

Good Morning Suzanne!
I have felt Christmas is a totally different way this year...instead of hibernating, I've enjoyed the snow. I even bundled up and sat on the front porch early yesterday morning to watch it fall. I'm enjoying the white lights all over my house, visited each of my neighbors and stayed long enough to talk and have coffee with a couple of them. There's no santa in my world this year, we have spent more time at church, helped with the open door mission and gifts will be few and only needed things. So far, it's been a season of seeing joy in nothing commercial, but the real and simple things around us.
Thanks for always making see things differently...that's a huge gift.
Have a wonderful day ~

Farmgirl Paints said...

I have found it. So thankful for a heart filled with JOY this morning:)

Jill said...

Good Morning Suzanne,

I find 'it' when we arrive at my parents home in mom has always made Christmas special and because I am technically not hosting, I enjoy relaxing and really being in the moment of it all with my girls. Up until then, I feel hurried and stressed!


Low Tide High Style said...

I am having a bit of trouble finding my "it" this Christmas as well. Now that my work load is lessened I'm hoping "it" will come rushing in and rescue me. I love the story about the little child and the glitter, so true. And even though I'm a summer girl, softly falling snow makes me feel like a kid again!

Beautiful post my friend, and I love your holiday music, both are helping me to find my "it" already!

Kat :)

Vava (aka Virginia) said...

Good morning Suzanne---thank you for visiting me. And you now know where MY Christmas is. In my heart! xoxo

lisaroyhandbags said...

I'll be finding 'it' this afternoon as I greet my guy at the airport for the holidays. No matter how many decorations I've put out, gifts I've wrapped, cookies I've baked, cards I've written, 'it' just isn't there until he's here with me to share it with. oh happy day! xo

Hillcrest Cottage said...

I agree with Lisa's comment above me. The older I get, the more "it" becomes having my family together in one room. One college guy rolled in on Wednesday, and the last piece of our family arrives from West Point tomorrow!

Amy Arnaz said...

Good Morning Suzanne~ I love the glitter story. It is so true. I snatched a quote from Julie Marie's blog that said: "He who doesn't have Christmas in his heart will never find it under a tree." Glitter in the Ladies Room. Wonderful. The vision of PJ pants hanging below your coat and the photo of your booted feet in the snow put a smile on my face this morning. Thank you. ~ Amy

Laura Ingalls Gunn said...

I found IT yesterday. You can read about it today.

Here's hoping that all who search will be led by light.

Julie said...


Thank you. Love you bloggy sis....You are a treasure. Your post carries a message that will touch every single heart that visits today, I am very sure. Especially mine.
Hugs to you. The little story was just precious. And I'm glad you "felt" the beauty of snow, and with your sweetest loyal little sidekick at your feet... awesome. Have a wonderful weekend. Going to copy and print that recipe. xoxo

My Grama's Soul said...

Hello Suzanne.....this post made my bruised little heart sing this morning.....As I get a little older IT may be harder to find......but I NEVER STOP SEARCHING!!!!~

Have a blessed weekend,


Seizing My Day said...

I love that story of Sam and the glitter... reminds me of my Sammy!! =) I love making messes with my littles and enjoying their joy as this season unfolds!! =) blessings from above!!

Days at Buttermilk Cottage said...

"IT" usually arrives for me when
(1) the decorating is done. I'm not over the top anymore, just bring out the things I love.
(2) the shopping is done. I've managed to get this far through the season without a single trip to the mall AND my shopping is finished!
(3) when I've done a little baking. This year I've been given so many nice treats which have been stored in the freezer that all I need to do is pull them out when Kate gets home.
SO, "IT" for me is just having some quiet and peaceful time to enjoy the decorations, hear the Christmas music, sit in front of the fire and experience JOY. IT is here!
Oh, I am planning to make your "Christmas Rolls" for our Christmas morning this year!
Best, Susan

hometown girl said...

the kids truly are my magic. the little one is counting down the days. he brought home my present today an ornament filled with feathers he said they are angel wings, it made me melt.....xo susan

LuLu said...

I really began to feel it yesterday in fact... the fist snow fall fell.... a friend came over for us to talk while our children played and as she was her i finally figured out my little vingettes i wanted to create for Christmas.... sometimes you just need another elf in the house to get you going! This weekedn i'm "forcing myself to forget the cleaning and just have fun wrapping.... cause when i wrap i make a mess!!!!!
blessing to you,

Lili said...

Loved that precious story about the red glitter and Christmas found. This year I found "it" one night when I spotted my neighbor's brightly lit lamp post that had those big old fashioned lightbulbs all wrapped around it. xoxo ~Lili

Olive Cooper said...

Sam and the red glitter oh what an object lesson. I find my "it" in spending time with those I love and those who love me (including the furry child). Your photos are lovely Suzanne.

pretty pink tulips said...

Hi darling Suzanne!!! I found a little bit more of "it" today. My bookclub was cancelled b/c the host was ill. My yoga group met early so that the host could attend a holiday concert for her daughter. So...there I was with extra time that I had not anticipated. And, so I hopped in my white sleigh (suv) and delivered the last of my Christmas goodies. fun! And that is relaxing. The dining room table is finally cleared of my son's art project - so that I can set it for Christmas Eve.

So, that's where I find it. In the quiet minutes that aren't filled at all. Sometimes space is all we need.

Wishing you space....and snow!
xoxo Elizabeth

paperbird said...

that is the sweetest story...

i have found it.. in the goodness of people.
like the sweet ones who have come by to join in our charity endeavor.
like you.
thank you so much suzanne for taking part in our charity auction.
truly it means so much to me.

and i am sorry to tell you that you have been outbid!
sweet blessings to you.

beautiful post by the way.

Linda said...

Beautiful post, Suzanne... this year I decided to try as hard as possible not to get stressed out or put pressure on myself. It really has helped me to enjoy being peaceful and finding my "it". We are in a good place as a family right now and that is giving me such joy this year...

Frog Hollow Farm Girl said...

Good morning Suzanne and sweet greetings from Frog Hollow Farm! I'm popping over from Kat's Low Tide High Style blog to say hello and let you know how much I loved reading this post! And Helen Keller's quote on the top of your page is just so simple and true! It seems harder and harder to go back to the simple things with the way the world is advancing in so many ways. But even during great adventures and in the midst of overwhelming technology the world continues to be beautiful in it's simple elegance. My 'it' is sometimes spilling over and sometimes simmering just below the surface. It's not always easy for me to let it out for some reason - isn't that silly? It's also a little sad at times...It just goes to show that we are all growing and learning all of the time. So glad I found you my friend! Ciao, bella!

Lisa said...

Suzanne, I love that little story about the red glitter. That is truly my philosophy on life - about finding your own happiness wherever you are; choosing to make your life joyful. I'm still looking for "it" - that true Christmas spirit - a little snow would certainly help! (I can't believe I'm wishing for snow but I am!) Have a happy weekend and thank you, as always, for the gift of your words.

Happy Homemaker UK | Laura said...

'It' - that's an interesting concept. Something that I think can only come passively. Can't be forced. I have to admit I don't feel 'it' myself, yet I feel 'it' through my daughter. She's almost 8 yrs old - completely gets the idea of Christmas magic and doesn't question it. I'm into her being into 'it'.

We leave in a few days to Lapland (Finland) to see the real Santa!! We haven't told the kids we're going. Can't wait!

Sally@DivineDistractions said...

I thought it was just me.....finding "it" has been a challenge this season, even with the grandboys and my daughter's extended visit! I think I've focused so much of my attention on working...grateful for good projects to do, but running a business and trying to make it profitable as really taken it's toll on me this year. I'm hoping when the last install is completed on Thurs that I can turn my thoughts to making the remaining time special. Thanks for sharing, Suzanne! Have a merry Christmas!

Stitchfork said...

Finishing up the last bits of all the other lists and will hopefully get to concentrate on family here shortly! Have a merry, merry weekend Suzanne! xo Cathy

Kathy's Red Door Welcome said...

Wow, Christmas in the bathroom...that says it all. Jesus did say the babes would lead us. These post certainly made me a little weepy. Merry Christmas Suzanne!

Melody said...

Beautiful post! Thank you, I needed that reminder. I've only had a wisp of it so far but I know there's more, I'll find it. :-)

Happy Homemaker UK | Laura said...

Suzanne, what a small blogging world! I went down the blogging rabbit hole for hours, which eventually led me to your interview on Farmgirl Paints - so fun to see your beautiful home!

Cashon&Co said...

I hate to admit it, but this year and last year I have been lost on the Christmas spirit. I can't pinpoint exactly why. Probably too busy, but that can't be the only reason. I know this is my oldest last year to believe so I don't want it to pass me by. These are the best years! I am thankful for so many things, so I pray that God will put the spirit in me for this special time. Because this is the season that can turn scrooges into santas and I DON'T want to be the former. I think the key is slowing down enough to see it all around you. I remember the BEST Christmas spirit in our country was in December of 2001. Right after 9/11. Don't you remember that you FELT that "oh THIS is what loving your neighbor means! THIS is what "no road rage" means!" THIS is what "being thankful" means! Out of the worst travsety to hit our nation, I think also brought us our BEST Christmas. Full of loving and Full of Grace & Thankfulness. Finally all those corny movies and songs meant something.
Ok, this HAS to be the LONgEST comment I've EVER left ! *wink~

Grammy said...

The secret for finding "it" is to concentrate on others. Whether it's the little shoe boxes I filled in early October for Samaritan's Purse, ready to donate in Nov., to the bell ringers encountered at the entrance to every store and their kettle that I put my dollars in with a Merry Christmas, to the specially chosen gifts for all my family members, to the old ring with the lost stone that I had remade for my 93 year old Mother, to the gift cards I gave to those. People that have been especially kind this year, I have found "it" by thinking about others, with an frequent thought to those that are not on my Christmas list, but are still present in my heart. I am so lucky to have this beautiful life.

Indie.Tea said...

This entry is so beautifully thoughtful, as are all of your entries I suppose :)
I haven't found 'it', the Christmas magic. I think what does it is family parties - seeing family and lots and lots of food - its a bit lacking this season for some odd reason!

Privet and Holly said...

Thank you, every one,
for opening your hearts
and sharing them with me.
I know that I will find
IT when I see my extended
family for Christmas. You
can read my mom's comment,
above, to know where I
got my wings.....and my
feet. She keeps me grounded.
Love you, Mom! xx

krys kirkpatrick said...

I know this sounds silly. But I heard this tip from Steven and Ondrea Levine. They said, just start singing. In your car, or during a walk, in the kitchen while you are baking. Make up the words ..sing of gratitude and silly stuff and go on and on...I can not carry a tune...but I let the sound come start to get the tingle and then the gratitude's amazing. May the song in your heart be the, " IT" that you seek.
Happy Jolly Winter to you.

Sheila said...

What a beautiful post, i love your style of writing, and your pictures. Bless, i love the story of Sam.
I get quite excited about Christmas, much too much excited, its one of the only times of the year im on top of things or in control. Normally i have to do things by the book, but when Christmas rolls around i actually feel like i want to do whatever makes me happy-i mean that about other people too-but i act like i should act all year round. I make sure my family is happy and thats it-if someone else wants to grump i dont let it bring me down, whereas normally i worry that other people are unhappy even if they are moany people!!!

Kathysue said...

Suzanne another lovely posting of such beautiful heartfelt words!!!Christmas IT!! Hmmmmm??? interesting question. I have been so full of joy this season, not sure why, but I truly have been. I do think I had a heartfelt IT moment that I posted about on my blog. The one where I almost lost something precious. That was a real heart opener(not eye opener) for me.
Feelings will always come and go, but that deep down true JOY is from above for me and it is always there. I am the one that loses sight of IT when I lose my focus and start focusing on me instead Of HIM/IT!!! xo Kathysue

Rene said...

I have found it Suzanne - with the help of my excited family. I hope you have a wonderful upcoming week.


Denni said...

Most years I've been so busy and trying so hard to find "it" that "it" hid from me.
Today, I found the Christmas spirit in my son as he waved to me while in the church Christmas pagent.
Yesterday, it filled me when I spied the tiniest newborn sleeping peaceful in her mother's arms.
This past week it surprised me when I forgot my wallet at home and the gas station attendant filled my tank and said "I know your good for it".
Everyday, I read posts like this one and it hits me again. The kindness people like you share through their blogs to perfect strangers is making me so joyful and spirit filled.
Thanks for all of your lovely posts. :)

Acanthus and Acorn said...

I love everything about Christmas so finding "it" isn't hard for me and it's usually the most simple things from the thrill of the snow outside, to the enjoying the light of the tree each night, to wrapping presents in shiny red paper! said...

I love this post. So beautiful. Thank you.

Miss Sew & So said...

hello my gorgeous friend....i {again!!} have tears rolling down my's where you find it in your heart ...its in the small shopping mall will create christmas for you....

living in the countryside here - with snow up to the window ledges and more slowly falling- it's the looks of our kiddos...the waiting for the postman...the village lights...the making of paper chains...the lighting of the nightly fire that is christmas in this old country house...

i ADORE the red glitter christmas tale...tears from me and all....

hope you are having a wonderful week leading up to christmas my dear friend....
And soo glad you loved the bunting....I loved making it for you...
Marrakech seems a lifetime ago now we are back in the land of White...

Melissa xoxox

Castles Crowns and Cottages said...

SUZANNE! Oh dear heart, you came to my scary world of imagination!!!! mind sometimes works in counter clockwise! But what fun it is NOW BEING AT HOME FOR TWO WEEKS OFF! YEAH! And I am watching the builders finish off the technical stuff like the electricity and venting. They even started building the 14 foot long closet in Ruben's new office but the snow is preventing them from roofing...but next week that is the plan. THEN, THE INTERIOR IS INSULATED and away we go to making this thing TIGHT and READY to open up into our dining room! Then, this spring, you are cordially invited to Rabbit Hill once again to see it, if you wish.

HERE IS WISHING YOU a BEAUTIFUL Minnesota white Christmas my dear....and your world has touched me so, Suzanne. Blessings to you, Anita